The Boyfriend Bylaws (Totally Fit) Read online

“Two Love Potions coming right up.” She nodded and disappeared.

  I guffawed at Noah’s festive beverage choice. “You don’t even know what’s in it.”

  “If we’re going to celebrate the Hallmark holiday together, we should really go all out. How bad can it be?” He winked at me and feather-like flutters tickled my belly.

  Actually, with the turn the night had taken, drinking mouthwash would’ve tasted fine. At least I’d get to spend the evening with Noah even if it was just as friends. “Our waitress doesn’t come across as happy to be here.”

  “Her mood seemed kind of grim, huh? Maybe she has an appointment with the dentist later she’s worried about.” His lips twitched into a grin.

  “I can’t believe you pulled this off.” The red rose centerpiece made me smile. I lifted a rose and breathed in the aroma. Ellen was going to have some serious explaining to do. “What happened to your big plans?”

  He grinned. “You mean watching Duke versus North Carolina with Bubbles? I figured I’d have more fun going out with you.”

  “Bubbles?” With that kind of name, I couldn’t decide whether or not I needed to be jealous.

  “My golden retriever. They named her at the pound before I rescued her. In case you were wondering.” He leaned forward in his chair. “Duke v. NC is a big deal. With March Madness right around the corner, this game could turn out to be a preview of the Final Four.”

  Sports talk. I had no idea how to translate that. If his big plans were to watch basketball with his dog, then that suggested…. “Does this mean you’re single?”

  He nodded and then reached for his water. “Would I be here if I weren’t?”

  “But you’re hot.” Oh, good job, Rachel. Impress him with your intelligence, why don’t you?

  He choked on his sip, coughed into his hand, then set his glass down. “I’ll take that as a compliment, but as long as we’re comparing looks…are you sure you’re single?”

  A zing went through me. Man, he was smooth. Very smooth.

  “Yes, I am.” I smirked. “Single, that is. Like you.”

  He laughed and I could feel the smoldering going on. “Good. Glad that’s settled.”

  The waitress returned with our mystery drinks, took our orders, then left without a hint of a smile.

  Noah eyed his martini glass. “Time to find out if it’s toxic.”

  “Should we take turns in case one of us has to call 911?” I asked, playfully.

  He leaned toward me, his face sobering. “I say we go down together.”

  My skin tingled and I so wanted to get that in writing. I lifted my pink drink. “Here’s to taking chances.”

  He raised his glass. “In more ways than one.”

  I took a sip and the syrupy sweet liquid slid down with ease. I loved it. I loved Ellen. I loved life. Wow, who would’ve thought it?

  Lowering my glass, I traced the sugary lip with my finger. “You know, I don’t do small talk well. I swore this would be my last blind date.”

  “I promise, no small talk. And as to your vow, I’ll do my best to hold you to it.”

  Hold me to it? I was kind of hoping he’d just hold me. I blushed at the thought and grasped for conversation. “How’s it possible you don’t have a girlfriend?” I blurted, still amazed that I was here. With Noah. The Noah. The one I’d been dreaming about for months. “Since you’re so hot, I mean.” I added that last part teasingly, poking fun at myself.

  I could tell he thought I was cute.

  Maybe this Love Potion stuff had been a good idea, after all. I took another fortifying sip.

  He set his glass down on the table. “Well, I was in a relationship for several years before I relocated for this job opportunity. Kate’s a great person, but we didn’t see ourselves spending the rest of our lives together. Our break-up was mutual and amicable.”

  Clearly, Kate was insane.

  He reached for a piece of bread, buttered it, then set it on my plate. “What about you?”

  “Nothing so civil.” I picked up the tiny slice of bread and took a breath. “Jeremy and I were never on the same page. It felt like two years trying to put a tuxedo on a pig.”

  “Sounds like a lot of work,” he said, seriously.

  “It was, but I can thank my hairdresser for taking the load off me. She’d been giving him more than haircuts, behind my back, if you know what I mean.”

  He winced. “Sorry to hear that.”

  I leaned toward him, bit my bottom lip, and gave a little shrug. “I’m over it.”

  “I’m glad.” Forget smoldering. We’d advanced to downright sizzling.

  Heat blazed through me. This ranked beyond The Friend Zone. If I could speak, I would’ve asked for the check. Instead, my eyes were locked with his and there was no way I was looking away first.

  The waitress set our plates down in front of us, distracting me and breaking the moment.

  Noah tugged at his collar, then picked up his fork. “What were we talking about?”

  “Relationships.” I beamed, loving that I seemed to affect him as much as he did me.

  “That’s right.” He cleared his throat. “You told me earlier, you had enough with trivial conversation. What’s that about?”

  I scooped some mashed potatoes with my fork. “Ellen, being an ecstatic newlywed, thrives on fixing me up through Henry. For some reason, whenever the small talk starts I just zone out. Can’t help it.”

  He blinked. “Who’s Henry?”

  “Ellen’s husband.” I lifted another forkful of potatoes, and they melted in my mouth. Even food tasted better when I was with Noah. “Which reminds me. She’d said I was meeting with Henry’s softball buddy. A Perfect 10.”

  He put a hand to his chest. “Are you saying I’m not a 10?”

  More like a 25. I moistened my lips, trying to be smooth. “I’m still deciding.”

  Just because I was head over heels, didn’t mean I’d play easy.

  “Well, then. Let me see if I can gain some points for creativity.” He dabbed the side of his mouth with his linen napkin and set his fork diagonally on his empty plate. “Since you seemed to be dreading the blind date so much, I figured I might have a shot.”

  My heart pounded in my chest.

  “Since you didn’t know your real date, I figured it wouldn’t make a difference if I had Ellen substitute me in instead.”

  Oh, it made a difference in a good way. I savored my last bite of salmon, almost unable to believe Noah’s confession.

  “Truth be told, Rachel,” he looked down, almost shy, before he met my eyes again, “I’ve tried my best to flirt with you for over two months now, but wasn’t quite sure if you were interested. You, um, seemed to date quite a bit.”

  I put a hand to my forehand. I’d suffered through two months without Noah because I’d been letting Ellen set me up. “How could you think I wouldn’t be interested? You’re…well, you’re hot.”

  He smiled softly. “Glad you think so, but you never indicated you thought that.”

  My body heated so fast, I had to hold the table to steady myself. “Consider yourself indicated.”

  He fixed his eyes on me, then slipped his hand over mine and laced our fingers. “Likewise.”

  I swallowed, having trouble getting my feelings across. “You know what I think, Noah?”

  He tightened his fingers and shook his head, still gazing at me. “What?”

  Deciding to call and cancel the nine o’clock cabbie, I gestured to my empty glass. “I think this Love Potion really works.”

  ****

  Life suddenly felt like a Disney movie. Girl meets boy. Girl likes boy. Boy surprises girl on a not-so-blind date. Boy gives girl ride home and girl finds his golden retriever on the front seat of his car—gotta love a man who’s devoted to his dog! Girl and boy go back to her place to watch sports highlights cuddled up on the couch together.

  I glanced at the rug on the floor where my miniature beagle curled against Noah’s Golden Retriever. �
�Thank goodness Chester and Bubbles seem to be hitting it off.”

  Noah slid his arm around me. “How do you think their owners are doing?”

  I gazed into those soft blue eyes and decided they were even more amazing close up. “This definitely rates as the best blind date ever.”

  He smiled, showing me those adorable crinkles, and then leaned toward me.

  I held my breath….

  Brrrring! My home phone shrilled.

  Oh, no. No! No! No!

  “Ignore it,” I whispered, but Noah was already handing me the phone.

  I glared at the plastic receiver. Who would call me at ten-thirty at night on V-Day? Didn’t they know I was busy? I pressed the talk button on my cordless. “Hello?”

  “Rach, it’s me.”

  I didn’t recognize the raspy male with the world’s worst timing. “Me who?”

  “It’s me.” Short pause and then, “Jeremy.”

  “Jeremy?” No. No way. I glanced at Noah, who seemed to be taking unprecedented interest in the candle arrangement on my coffee table. “Why in the world are you calling me?”

  He sniffed. “Debbie broke up with me this morning. Says I’m not over you and she’s right.”

  I shuddered. “Did you overdose on heart candy or something?”

  “You sound upset.”

  “Uh, yeah, I am.” I glanced at Noah who was now studying me. He smiled. I scooted toward him. He moved closer. I—

  “—I need you to give me a second chance,” Jeremy pleaded.

  I gripped the phone I’d forgotten I was holding. “Nope. Not going to happen.”

  “It’s Valentine’s Day, Rach. Can I at least come over so we can talk?”

  After our break-up, there was a brief time when I’d hoped Jeremy would come to his senses, beg my forgiveness, and want me back. Scary to think I might’ve settled for someone I didn’t even trust. “I’m sorry you got dumped, Jeremy. But I have to go. Good luck, okay?”

  He whimpered. “Does this mean you don’t forgive me?”

  “Forgive you?” This time I burst out laughing. “Jeremy, you did me a favor. Bye!”

  I threw the phone to the far side of the sofa.

  Noah lifted a hand to touch my chin. “Wrong number?”

  “Wrong, whacky, disturbing number.”

  “I hate it when that happens.” To my disappointment, he removed his hand and picked up the remote control. “You watched the highlights for me so, if you want, I’ll watch Sex and the City for you.”

  “Really? You don’t have to.” Sweet, but he truly didn’t have to. I couldn’t care less about Sarah Jessica Parker right now.

  “I want to earn as many brownie points as possible.” He slipped his arm around me and snuggled close. “Besides, I plan to distract you from the TV. A lot.”

  I moistened my lips. “Do we have to wait until it starts?”

  He bent toward me, then brushed his nose against mine. “Happy Valentine’s Day, Rachel.”

  His breath felt warm against my cheek.

  Oh yum. Double yum. “Next year I expect flowers,” I whispered.

  His lips brushed my jawbone. “Anything you say.”

  Unable to wait any longer, I cupped his face in my hands, and pressed my mouth to his. Soft, warm, amazing. Our kiss deepened, sending shivers through me. Our mouths melted together and my off-kilter world clicked into place.

  You know all those previous heartaches? How I’d wanted to give up? How hard it had been for me to take a risk?

  It was all worth it. I’d suffer through much worse to end up in this exact moment. Here with Noah. My last blind date.

  THE END

  About the author:

  SUSAN HATLER writes humorous and emotional contemporary romance and young adult novels. A natural optimist, she believes life is amazing, people are fascinating, and imagination is endless. She loves spending time with her characters and hopes you do, too. You can visit her website at www.susanhatler.com

  Other books by Susan Hatler:

  Shaken - available now

  High school junior, Kylie Bates, can suddenly read minds. When she touches people’s hands, she’s able to see their deepest thoughts. As if that’s not freaky enough, her dad sends her to help hottie detective, Sam Williams, track down a missing girl. Way too much pressure, especially for a girl who can’t watch Scream without getting nightmares.

  Then, finding the missing girl leads to much more than Kylie’s prepared for. Like discovering that her dad has been lying to her. That she has a family she never knew about. That the girls have powers similar to hers. Oh yeah, and that someone is out to get her.

  When the detective’s teenage wanna-be-cop cousin, Trip Williams, approaches Kylie at school insisting she help him solve the case, she discovers Trip might be the only one she can trust, and the only one to help her unravel the secrets behind her mysterious gift.

  See Me – coming soon

  Amy Love, a high school junior, plays a Ouija board with friends one night and unintentionally connects with someone whose, well, not visible to the naked eye. When her body’s taken over and her soul is stuck watching helplessly—she’s terrified. When the zombie guzzles bologna that she will have to work off at the gym—she’s angry. And, when her zombied bod pulls up a news article on her laptop about a boy named JJ Miller who was recently in a car crash—she’s . . . intrigued.

  When the zombie chooses another host, Amy learns that the zombie is actually teen JJ Miller, the famous son of Maisy Meow comic creator Jonathan Jacob Miller Sr. JJ tells Amy he doesn’t know whether he’s dead or alive, only that when he’s not in a body, she is the only one who seems to know he exists.

  Amy decides to help JJ discover what happened to him and, when they can’t find his body, they try to find a substitute—preferably one that isn’t occupied. On the journey, JJ leads Amy into all kinds of danger. To her surprise, he also leads her heart to somewhere unexpected. She’s always heard of love at first sight, not love at first fright, but how can Amy be falling for a boy she’s never even seen?

  If you enjoy Susan Hatler’s books, you’ll also love Veronica Blade:

  Blind Date, Checkmate by Veronica Blade

  Should a woman who’s unable to forget her first love give “happily ever after” one more try?

  Shelby Winters’ one great love went sour. If she can’t feel that way again, why bother?

  When her best friend sets Shelby up on a blind date with Logan, the one who broke her heart, he pursues her relentlessly, forcing her to make a choice: give her heart what it’s always desired and risk total devastation or shut Logan out and lose her only shot at happiness.

  To Shelby, it’s a lose-lose situation. Or is it?

  If you’re looking for a sexy romance, you’ll love Virna DePaul:

  Wild For Him by Virna DePaul

  Can an uptight prosecutor and a laid-back defense attorney find love despite their opposing agendas?

  Bryn Donovon became a prosecutor for a reason and defense attorney Daniel Mays seems to take his job about as seriously as he does his love life. While straight-laced Bryn can’t deny she’s attracted to the southern charmer, she’s determined to keep her distance. Instead, she ends up finding something she’d lost long ago—a willingness to risk all for love.